Carrot was two metres tall but he'd been brought up as a dwarf, an then
further up as a human.


Young Edward thinks that there is no lake of blood too big to wade through
to put a rightful king on a throne, no deed too base in defence of a crown.
A romantic, in fact.
	-- Lord Rust describes Edward d'Eath.


The Ramkins were more highly bred than a hilltop bakery, whereas Corporal
Nobbs had been disqualified from the human race for shoving.


The Battle of Koom Valley is the only one known to history where both sides
ambushed each other.
	-- Why trolls and dwarfs hate each other.


He was said to have the body of a twenty-five year old, although no one
knew where he kept it.
	-- Talking about Corporal Nobbs.


"Pride is all very well, but a sausage is a sausage."
	-- Gaspode, of course.


If the Creator had said, "Let there be light" in Ankh-Morpork, he'd have
gotten no further because of all the people saying "What colour?"


The river Ankh is probably the only river in the universe on which the
investigators can chalk the outline of the corpse.


The Alchemist's Guild is opposite the Gambler's Guild. Usually. Sometimes
it's above it, or below it, or falling in bits around it.


Sham Harga had run a succesful eatery for many years by always smiling,
never extending credit, and realizing that most of his customers wanted
meals properly balanced between the four food groups: sugar, starch, grease
and burnt crunchy bits.


Cuddy had only been a guard for a few days, but already he had absorbed one
important and basic fact: it is almost impossible for anyone to be in a
street without breaking the law.


From the back, Vetinari looked like a carnivorous flamingo.


The Patrician relaxed, in a way which only then drew gentle attention to
the foregoing moment of tension.


Sometimes it's better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness.


Being a werewolf meant having the dexterity and jaw power to instantly rip
out a man's jugular. It was a trick of her father's that had always annoyed
her mother, especially when he did it just before meals.


The door was still ajar, but there was a tentative tap on it which said, in
a kind of metaphorical morse code, that the tapper could see very well that
Carrot was in his room with a scantily clad woman and was trying to knock
without actually being heard.


"It's got three keyboards and a hundred extra knobs, including twelve with
"?" on them."
	-- The Unseen University Organ, as designed by B. S. Johnson.


BIG FIDO?
"Yes?"
HEEL.
	-- Go read the book...